I have been so happy spending this last week with my little ones in TX. For the most part we have been doing a little snuggling, playing, relaxing, and just enjoying being together.
Sadly, now it is time to leave.
AND I got some sad new while I am here.
The kiddos have been having fun and have been very happy… until last night. I fly back tomorrow morning and they are smart little ones and had done the math, realizing that it is soon that I am leaving.
So last night, as we laid down to sleep, both of my beautiful babies cried themselves to sleep. I tried to retain my composure but it became impossible. They cried so loud and hard and really working themselves into a frenzy.
All I could do was hold them… and reassure them that everything will be ok, and that there is nothing wrong with being sad from time to time.
Leaving is always the hardest part.
My birthday just recently passed… and my love made sure that he covered all bases. He got me a rocken gift, a MAC makeup paller… and a beautiful card that begins with “For the love of my life”. What I loved what was he wrote inside… his love very evident and beautiful. AND… he put a 21 candle on my cake as apposed to my real age, can he get any better? Certainly not. He is amazing and I love him through and through.
What HE wrote in the card: I love you my sweet beautiful baby! I have enjoyed getting to know you and follow the woman you were to the woman you are and to the woman you will become. I am happy to be a part of it.
What the card said: For the love of my life from the man who adores you. Thank you for being the love of my life, the wonderful one I adore, the person who shares all my dreams and desires, my plans, my adventures and more. Thank you for being my very best friend, my comforter when things go wrong, the one who encourages, cheers me, believes in me, changes my “weak” to my “strong.” Thank you for being my partner in life and for filling my heart with such pride- I feel like the happiest man in the world with the woman I love by my side.
Need I say more…
Last time I wrote a post, I was going through withdrawals because the new Doc I was seeing decided all my medication doses were too high for his liking. So he lowered them all…by half. Haldol and Klonopin (part of my bipolar meds) was cut in half as was my pain medication I take for severe pelvic pain and pressure.
The result?? Withdrawal.
I went through many days of being unable to sleep, chills, sweats, loose bowels, my skin feeling like it was on fire… etc.
I waited it out and went to a new Doc who was recommended to me. I was told that she really listens to you and wants to help make you better.
I went to this new Doc (who happens to actually be a nurse practitioner) and was amazed with her listening skills, offering feedback, and giving me options. Unfortunately, I must be on all my meds, not one can be altered, even the pain meds until the end of the year when they can actually run the necessary tests and probably surgery to search for the cause of the pain. Not having insurance makes it difficult to do anything other than medicate.
I was properly prepared with a typed out list of what doctors I have seen in the past for my present conditions, the meds they prescribed, and the phone numbers to verify what I am saying. She was very happy with this list and said that it is what helped her make the decision on how to treat me. I had all bases covered as will she with my medical records.
Always seek out a second opinion if you are not happy with your current doc. Always.
** edited to add that she prescribed my meds with the previous dosages.